AÂ wind tunnel

She was Sooooooooooooooooo Blonde?
* She tripped over a cordless phone.
* She spent 20 minutes looking at the orange juice can because it said ?Concentrate.?
* She told me to meet her at the corner of ?WALK? and ?DON?T WALK.?
* She tried to put M&M?s in alphabetical order.

She was Soooooooooooooooooooo Blonde?
* She studied for a blood test.
* She sold the car for gas money.
* When she missed bus #44 she took bus #22 twice instead.
* When she went to the airport and saw a sign that said, ?Airport Left,? she turned around and went home.

She Was Sooooooooooooooooooooo Blonde ?
* When she heard that 90% of all crimes occur around the home, she moved.
* She thought if she spoke her mind, she?d be speechless.
* She thought that she could not use her AM radio in the evening.
* She had a shirt that said ?TGIF,? which she thought stood for ?This Goes In Front.?

She is sooooooooooooooooo Blonde?

She thinks Taco Bell is the Mexican phone company??

Anyway, sure enough, he jumped, so the blonde gave the redhead the $50 she owed.

The redhead said ?I can?t take this, you?re my friend?. The blonde said ?No! A bet?s a bet?.

So the redhead said ?Listen, I have to admit, I saw this on the 5 O?clock news, so I can?t take your money?.

The blonde replied ?Well, so did I, but I never thought he?d jump again!?

The next day, the man and the ostrich come again and the man says, ?A
hamburger, fries and a coke.?
The ostrich says, ?I?ll have the same.?
Again the man reaches into his pocket and pays with exact change.
This becomes routine until the two enter again. ?The usual?? asks the
waitress.
?No, this is Friday night, so I will have a steak, baked potato and a
salad,? says the man.
?Same,? says the ostrich.

Shortly the waitress brings the order and says, ?That will be $32.62.?
Once again the man pulls the exact change out of his pocket and places
it on the table.
The waitress cannot hold back her curiosity any longer.
?Excuse me, sir. How do you manage to always come up with the exact
change in your pocket every time??

?Well,? says the man, ?several years ago I was cleaning the attic and
found an old lamp.

When I rubbed it, a Genie appeared and offered me two wishes.
My first wish was that if I ever had to pay for anything, I would just
put my hand in my pocket and the right amount of money would always be
there.?
?That?s brilliant!? says the waitress. ?Most people would ask for a
million dollars or something, but you?ll always be as rich as you want
for as long as you live!?
?That?s right. Whether it?s a gallon of milk or a Rolls Royce, the
exact money is always there,? says the man.
The waitress asks, ?What?s with the ostrich??

The man sighs, pauses and answers, ?My second wish was for a tall chick
with a big ass and long legs who agrees with everything I say.?

Q. If you?re going to make a parachute jump, at least how high should you be?
A. Charley Weaver: Three days of steady drinking should do it.

Q. True or False, a pea can last as long as 5,000 years.
A. George Gobel: Boy, it sure seems that way sometimes.

Q. You?ve been having trouble going to sleep. Are you probably a man or a woman?
A. Don Knotts: That?s what?s been keeping me awake.

Q. According to Cosmopolitan, if you meet a stranger at a party and you think that he is attractive, is it okay to come out and ask him if he?s married?
A. Rose Marie: No, wait until morning.

Q. Which of your five senses tends to diminish as you get older?
A. Charley Weaver: My sense of decency.

Q. In Hawaiian, does it take more than three words to say ?I Love You??
A. Vincent Price: No, you can say it with a pineapple and a twenty.

Q. What are ?Do It,? ?I Can Help,? and ?I Can?t Get Enough??
A. George Gobel: I don?t know, but it?s coming from the next apartment.

Q. As you grow older, do you tend to gesture more or less with your hands while talking?
A. Rose Marie : You ask me one more growing old question Peter, and I?ll give you a gesture you?ll never forget.

Q. Paul, why do Hell?s Angels wear leather?
A. Paul Lynde: Because chiffon wrinkles too easily.

Q. Charley, you?ve just decided to grow strawberries. Are you going to get any during the first year?
A. Charley Weaver: Of course not, I?m too busy growing strawberries.

Q. In bowling, what?s a perfect score?
A. Rose Marie: Ralph, the pin boy.

Q. It is considered in bad taste to discuss two subjects at nudist camps. One is politics, what is the other?
A. Paul Lynde: Tape measures.

Q. During a tornado, are you safer in the bedroom or in the closet?
A. Rose Marie: Unfortunately Peter, I?m always safe in the bedroom.

Q. Can boys join the Camp Fire Girls?
A. Marty Allen: Only after lights out.

Q. When you pat a dog on its head he will wag his tail. What will a goose do?
A. Paul Lynde: Make him bark?

Q. If you were pregnant for two years, what would you give birth to?
A. Paul Lynde: Whatever it is, it would never be afraid of the dark.

Q . According to

Ann Landers, is there anything wrong with getting into the habit of kissing a lot of people?
A. Charley Weaver: It got me out of the army.

Q. It is the most abused and neglected part of your body, what is it?
A. Paul Ly nde: Mine may be abused, but it certainly isn?t neglected.

Q. Back in the old days, when Great Grandpa put horseradish on his head , what was he trying to do?
A. George Gobel: Get it in his mouth.

Q. Who stays pregnant for a longer period of time, your wife or your elephant?
A. Paul Lynde: Who told you about my elephant?

Q. When a couple have a baby, who is responsible for its sex?
A. Charley Weaver: I?ll lend him the car, the rest is up to him.

Q. Jackie Gleason recently revealed that he firmly believes in them and has actually seen them on at least

two occasions. What are they?
A. Charley Weaver: His feet.

Q. According to Ann Landers, what are two things you should never do in bed?
A. Paul Lynde: Point and laugh