Talk Funny Jokes » Food

Mourning Eggs Sunny Side Up

admin — Sat, 05 Nov 2011 03:09:46 +0000

Joke with no Title

admin — Tue, 12 Jan 2010 11:06:42 +0000

If you remember the Original Hollywood Square s and its comics, this may bring a tear to your eyes. These great questions and answers are from the days when ? Hollywood Squares? game show responses were spontaneous, not scripted, as they are now. Peter Marshall was the host asking the questions, of course.
Q. Do female frogs croak?
A. Paul Lynde: If you hold their little heads under water long enough.

Q. If you?re going to make a parachute jump, at least how high should you be?
A. Charley Weaver: Three days of steady drinking should do it.

Q. True or False, a pea can last as long as 5,000 years.
A. George Gobel: Boy, it sure seems that way sometimes.

Q. You?ve been having trouble going to sleep. Are you probably a man or a woman?
A. Don Knotts: That?s what?s been keeping me awake.

Q. According to Cosmopolitan, if you meet a stranger at a party and you think that he is attractive, is it okay to come out and ask him if he?s married?
A. Rose Marie: No, wait until morning.

Q. Which of your five senses tends to diminish as you get older?
A. Charley Weaver: My sense of decency.

Q. In Hawaiian, does it take more than three words to say ?I Love You??
A. Vincent Price: No, you can say it with a pineapple and a twenty.

Q. What are ?Do It,? ?I Can Help,? and ?I Can?t Get Enough??
A. George Gobel: I don?t know, but it?s coming from the next apartment.

Q. As you grow older, do you tend to gesture more or less with your hands while talking?
A. Rose Marie : You ask me one more growing old question Peter, and I?ll give you a gesture you?ll never forget.

Q. Paul, why do Hell?s Angels wear leather?
A. Paul Lynde: Because chiffon wrinkles too easily.

Q. Charley, you?ve just decided to grow strawberries. Are you going to get any during the first year?
A. Charley Weaver: Of course not, I?m too busy growing strawberries.

Q. In bowling, what?s a perfect score?
A. Rose Marie: Ralph, the pin boy.

Q. It is considered in bad taste to discuss two subjects at nudist camps. One is politics, what is the other?
A. Paul Lynde: Tape measures.

Q. During a tornado, are you safer in the bedroom or in the closet?
A. Rose Marie: Unfortunately Peter, I?m always safe in the bedroom.

Q. Can boys join the Camp Fire Girls?
A. Marty Allen: Only after lights out.

Q. When you pat a dog on its head he will wag his tail. What will a goose do?
A. Paul Lynde: Make him bark?

Q. If you were pregnant for two years, what would you give birth to?
A. Paul Lynde: Whatever it is, it would never be afraid of the dark.

Q . According to

Ann Landers, is there anything wrong with getting into the habit of kissing a lot of people?
A. Charley Weaver: It got me out of the army.

Q. It is the most abused and neglected part of your body, what is it?
A. Paul Ly nde: Mine may be abused, but it certainly isn?t neglected.

Q. Back in the old days, when Great Grandpa put horseradish on his head , what was he trying to do?
A. George Gobel: Get it in his mouth.

Q. Who stays pregnant for a longer period of time, your wife or your elephant?
A. Paul Lynde: Who told you about my elephant?

Q. When a couple have a baby, who is responsible for its sex?
A. Charley Weaver: I?ll lend him the car, the rest is up to him.

Q. Jackie Gleason recently revealed that he firmly believes in them and has actually seen them on at least

two occasions. What are they?
A. Charley Weaver: His feet.

Q. According to Ann Landers, what are two things you should never do in bed?
A. Paul Lynde: Point and laugh

Tagalog jokes 6 | Fedmich Computer Shop

admin — Mon, 23 Nov 2009 08:00:00 +0000

ABOGADO First day sa office ni Juan bilang abogado SECRETARY: Sir, may bisita po kayo.. kinuha agad ni Juan ang telepono. pa bilib, kunwari may kausap.

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Tagalog jokes 6 | Fedmich Computer Shop

Funny FacePlant Videos

admin — Fri, 13 Nov 2009 15:13:14 +0000

Who doesn’t like to see a good faceplant Not aware of what a faceplant is, it’s when someone falls over and lands on their face. AKA the face plant

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Funny FacePlant Videos

Talk Funny Jokes | The Peanut Butter

admin — Thu, 15 Oct 2009 10:58:00 +0000

A tour bus driver is driving with a bus load of seniors down a highway when he is tapped on his shoulder by a little old lady. She offers him a handful of peanuts, which he gratefully munches up.

After about 15 minutes, she taps him on his shoulder again and she hands him another handful of peanuts.

She repeats this gesture about five more times.

When she is about to hand him another batch again he asks the little old lady, “why don’t you eat the peanuts yourself?”.

“We can’t chew them because we’ve no teeth”, she replied.

The puzzled driver asks,

“Why do you buy them then?”
The old lady replied,

“We just love the chocolate around them.”

No Work On Monday September 7, 2009 (Iglesia ni Cristo Executive …

admin — Sat, 05 Sep 2009 00:22:27 +0000

lowe on haizt…wala akong mgawa!!!! try qng mgsulat…hehehe · Contact Center Philippines on Funny Jokes : Sales / Call Center / Customer Support Agent Moments; michael pogi on Boys, Here are some Pickup Lines For the Girls (puro tagalog …

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No Work On Monday September 7, 2009 (Iglesia ni Cristo Executive …

Coke Joke

admin — Wed, 19 Aug 2009 13:58:00 +0000

The restaurant we had our lunch has some waiters never stop looking at 2 of us, probably rare to serve foreign tourists. To let them know we are happy with the foods they served, Andy smiles to them and show them a common Universal gesture with a thumb high up representing good. Who knows that two waiters went out to the street for a while and I heard them talking to each other in Hindi language. Minutes later, one of them came to us together with 2 bottles of Coca-cola look-alike soft drinks. He opens both the bottle caps in front of us and then walks away. Me and Andy staring at each other in confused. We thought they usually serve customers this way with free drinks after meals but later I look closely at the logo of the bottle, Thumbs Up

Baby Eating a Watermelon Funny Picture Caption

admin — Fri, 03 Jul 2009 18:24:47 +0000

Funny what babies do with food, so give us your best funny caption for the image above.

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Baby Eating a Watermelon Funny Picture Caption

Redneck Jokes 501-600

admin — Sat, 06 Dec 2008 01:54:58 +0000

Redneck Jokes 501-600 Other Redneck Jokes Redneck Jokes 1 to 100 Redneck Jokes 101 to 200 Redneck Jokes 201 to 300 Redneck Jokes 301 to 400 Redneck Jokes 401 to 500 Redneck Jokes 501 to 600 Redneck Jokes 601 to 700 Redneck Jokes 701 to 800 Redneck Jokes 801 to 900 Redneck Joke 501 You might be a redneck if you thought the Y2K Bug was a new species of insect. Redneck Joke 502 You might be a redneck if you throw a beer can out the truck window and your wife shoots it

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Redneck Jokes 501-600

Mexican Jokes

admin — Fri, 05 Dec 2008 14:36:59 +0000

Mexican Joke 01 A bunch of Mexicans are running down a hill, what is going on? A Prison Break

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Mexican Jokes